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Transforming Trauma

The recent tragedy in Boulder has shaken our tight-knit community.

As we send our children back to school, make trips to a new grocery store nearby, and drive by the memorial site daily, we are reminded of what happened here just over a week ago. We are reminded that it so easily could have been our children, our neighbors, or friends.

Yesterday while taking my son to the doctor, we got stuck in the funeral procession for officer Talley. He is the fallen hero in our community who was the first to the scene, and tragically, lost his life.

Cop cars were everywhere and sirens whirred and lights blinked. I wasn't aware the funeral was happening. All I experienced were cop cars everywhere. My mind immediately went to another tragedy. I was sure something was happening in a nearby store that we needed to get away from. I turned around and started to drive quickly home with my son.

Trauma lives in the body.

Until we are conscious of it, our past pain controls our every move in life.

I had no idea what was going on. I assumed based on what's happened here last week that we were unsafe. I made a decision to flee the scene, though we were in no danger at all.

Most of us live our entire lives with reservoirs of trauma living just below the surface, controlling our thoughts, actions, and decisions, though we are completely unconscious of it.

Mine is a small example of what can happen on a grand scale if we don't move our wounds, conscious and unconscious, through us.

But how do we do this? How can we transform our traumas, both big and small, so that they become the catalyst for our evolution, as opposed to the excuses that keep us small?

  1. Stay put -- allow what's coming up. FEEL sad. Pissed. Confused. Lonely. You have emotions for a reason. An emotion only lasts 20 seconds if you allow it and don't attach to it. Running from them, projecting them, or pretending they don't exist only suppresses them. This will have consequences later.

  2. Activate your body -- trauma, both what you are conscious of and unconscious, lives in the body. Shake, bounce and dance in new ways. This allows emotion, which is merely energy, to move through as it's meant to.

  3. Normalize -- create healthy routines to keep you grounded amidst the whirlwind of your particular hardship. Healthy habits are the way back to wellness of being.

  4. Give meaning -- Viktor Frankl, a brilliant neurologist and psychologist who survived the Holocaust created what's called logotherapy. This principle reminds us that when you make meaning out of something, especially your pain, you heal and live with fulfillment. This doesn't mean make everything positive. Rather, fill in this question: "as I result of this hardship, I learned to X..."

This is the work we go deep into this work at our upcoming PURIFY Retreat. If moving from pain to power interests you, reach out to me. There are still 2 spots left for PURIFY April 29-May 2, 2021 in Steamboat Springs, CO.

No matter how you're being stretched right now, take it easy on yourself. If you're committed to being conscious, you can transform any pain into power.

With love,



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