Happy Wednesday, y'all!
Just last weekend we held our Go in With Grace Retreat to set the stage for a beautiful holiday season this year. 32 women joined, even a few from out of state. Man, was it a special group of women.
There is something incredible powerful about pulling conscious women, who are open to inner exploration, together.
These days, the way we women gather often involves way too much alcohol, way to much rich and decadent food, and lots of shit-talking about one another. And we wonder why we feel like crap?
Well, I'm about creating spaces and ways to engage one another that bring about personal and communal expansion. I believe we accomplished that at our mini-retreat in Boulder last weekend.
We covered so much in a quick 3 hours, but one of our topics of focus was expectations around the holidays of ourselves and another, and how they lead to incredible suffering.
Each of us has our own view of what Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas or our holiday of choice should like. It must be at my house, we think, it's tradition. Or, if we don't have turkey, it isn't a proper Thanksgiving. Or it doesn't feel like Christmas if all siblings aren't present. And on and on...
The trouble is, while one person believes meaning comes from a giant gathering with all family members on board, another feels a quiet and slow paced celebration is what makes the holiday special.
And neither one is wrong. We are rarely all on the same page about our holiday expecations.
Eckhart Tolle talks about the pain body, which is his concept that unprocessed emotions that have not had the chance to move through us literally become a part of our energetic body. These unmet emotions get triggered from time to time, showing us there is still work to do.
Holidays can be one of these times of triggering. When met with an overwhelming amount of expectations, our old emotional pains flare up. Some of us even lash out.
So, we work to be conscious. We work to limit our expectations of ourself, and another. As Ram Daas reminds us: "A feeling of aversion or attachment to something is your clue that there's work to be done." When we notice ourselves gripping, standing firm on our opinions, and placing unfair expectations based on our own unmet needs on another, we soften.
Step back.
Try again.
There is no one right way to have a holiday.
Or when we see someone in our family or friend circle overreacting, we stay conscious and present, realizing our own work is to refrain from judgement and embody peace.
So, in the highest spirit of the season, I wish you presence this holiday. May we all refrain from expectation, may we recognize our own pain-body or that of another, and may we Go in with Grace.
Happy pre-holiday, y'all.
Love,
Brie
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